Tales of the Monkey(s)

[firechief46]

Well, well, what do we have here. By God, its a brand spanking new version of the Rota-Ray, well golllllllllyyyyyyyy. Well let me see, I already have more damn strobes than a disco, there is no more room for a strobe pack but you know what? I need this thing on that vehicle come hell or high water. Just hope PG** doesnt find it missing.

[firechief46]

Willie and Eric perform the final practical exercise from the MFRI Aerial Rescue class. Nuthin like seeing pro's at work.

[PUMPER 46]

Learn how to spell!

Little brother needs to learn how to spell. Have you seen the new command vehicle ? I thought battalion was the correct spelling, not (batalion)!

Lil bro needs to pull his head out of managements ass and come up for air, And rehab some brain cells.

PLEASE: Let us all give thanks for gods gift to the fire service Lil bro. Our outstanding driver/operator/fire chief.

stay safe,

Pumper 46

[firechief46]

Listen here butt munch, mispell one word and I am condemned to eternal hell?I dont have any time to correct typo's, I am too busy reading "Be a winner with the casino gambler". Now leave me alone.

BOY.

[firechief46]

Maybe Da' Fort needs one of these to keep the man in his place instead of traveling to other installations to teach classes.

[firechief46]

Have pack will travel...

[firechief46]

So this is what they used for all those years when they said they were fishing me.

[firechief46]

What coat tails? I used the collar instead, gives you a better grip.

[firechief46]

If it worked for the Big C, just maybe it will work for me.

[firechief46]

My Name is Wilbur....

Wilburs life has been full of poor choices and mistakes, but after getting hired by Ft. Meade he has an epiphany and vows to change his ways. Upon discovering that he has been selected, Wilbur is hit by TWD and his meat blows out of his limp hand as he lies unconscious on the living room floor. While recovering in the bedroom and watching television, Wilbur has a karmic epiphany, thanks to Carson Daly, who attributes his success to doing good for others. A light bulb goes off in Wilbur’s dim head and he sets out to right every wrong he has done starting with a firehouse geek.

[PUMPER 46]

You Won't Belive!,

Firechief46,

You won't belive what the ---hole Ape man just did. I will pm you with it before it's posted. This will knock your socks off!

stay safe,

Pumper 46

[firechief46]

As he sat silently behind the computer screen, in his head he was planning world domination.

[firechief46]

Finally it can be unsealed: This is the only existing photo of our boy Wilbur and the Chunk. Just prior to going for a ride in the Jeep Wilbur and the Chunk relax and talk about their upcoming adventure.

[firechief46]

After enough of Wilburs sh_t as the training specialist Chief Daley gives him another assignment in the inspections department.

[firechief46]

As he pondered impending doom looming ahead and knowing full well that taking over the world would take more than himself, our monkey thought to himself " what better way to gain the advantage, I know, Ill clone myself".

[firechief46]

After a sucessful DNA hibernation and partial skeleton developement period the master released his clone into the earthy enviroment and found the resemblence truly remarkable.

[firechief46]

Whadda U mean I can't go the Academy and Bolling anymore?

[PUMPER 46]

Outstanding picture !

"The banned Ape" True, we also heard that wilbur was banned from navy activities while on the army time, but he still burns up the phone lines everywhere talking sh*t.

I'm so done with this worthless piece of cow dung! He better never ask me to help him teach another class again. This back stabber has cut my throat by trying to take class's away from me that I was scheduled to teach, thus running his hands down into my pockets taking away my part time work.

You best belive he wasn't going after my package, but my money!

stay safe,

Pumper 46

[firechief46]

Ask for your help in teaching a class that will be the day. I never cut your throat and as far as taking classes away, they were never yours in the first place thats why they where pencilled in. At least when I teach most of the class passes. And I never took your part time money, sounds as though you are smashing some sour grapes at my expense. Lets get the truth out once and for all lamebrain.

Just remember this important lesson, I never played you like a violin but instead just like in the movie, Deliverance, remember when Ned Beatty discovered the hard way that the term "Mountin' Man" has nothing to do with geography? Thats how I played you.

In fact this is the way it looked, "C'mon boy, squeal, squeal like a pig" (oink, oink).

[firechief46]

The Rules of Fight Club.


1st RULE: You do not talk about FIGHT CLUB.

2nd RULE: You DO NOT talk about FIGHT CLUB.

3rd RULE: If someone says "stop" or goes limp, taps out the fight is over.

4th RULE: Only two guys to a fight.

5th RULE: One fight at a time.

6th RULE: No shirts, no shoes.

7th RULE: Fights will go on as long as they have to.

8th RULE: If this is your first night at FIGHT CLUB, you HAVE to fight.

And for you C.P. remember the most important rule of all:

9th RULE: Monkey always wins :D

[firechief46]

Captain: Hey Wilbur, wherein the hell is my Fire Officer III certification?

[firechief46]

While taking the acceptance physical at Ft. Meade, Army doctors were dumbfounded by the results of the cranium exam.

[fedtick]

It can be looked at 2 ways that more people pass your class...

1. You give everyone the answers to the tests
2. You are a good instructor, and everyone passes.

It can aslo be looked at 2 ways for people not passing...

1. you dont give shit away and make people work in the class
2. The entire calss is a bunch of shit for brain retards.

[firechief46]

Oh yeah, is that so. Well here is how I really feel.

[firechief46]

Hey, all you jackoffs! Keep screwing with me on this web blogger and I will show you what I am really capable of.

[firechief46]

Just cause Ima lernin' to play with dis hair gitar dusint give u da right to dump ona me. I been praksin real herd und I been gittin real good. Wanna hair me play a toon?

[xmas]

Its time to stop, You guys have beat this horse into the ground way to much, some of your post are funny and some are just plain stupid, If there is anything else you want to say to Chief H. or any one in his family I sugest you give them a phone call or post your name and I'm sure they will give you a call, Tom C. its time for you to spend more time in your new job and leave the USNA fire dept just they way you left it, Pumper 46
I sure don't know what the H's boys did to you but either get over it on post up and meet them and take care of it like men, Now people are making new screen names just to add fuel to the fire, we know (Lucifer) you are one of the other screen names, Some of your points might be correct, however its time to move on.

[firechief46]

Lucifer, DON'T GO THERE. I have been more evil and around alot longer than you.

PS: Evil always prevails.

[firechief46]

Hey Lucifer, lookee here.

[firechief46]

What our hero Wilbur will eventually do to Captain Brownie (eventually). Hump the stuffing right out of him like a sponge.

[firechief46]

And so does anyone who has dealt with Wibur.

[firechief46]

So you all think your funny by posting Wanted posters of me at the gates for the marine guards to turn me away. You forgot one thing, I have a CAT card and here it is. No base installation is safe from intrusion by the Ape Man!

[firechief46]

The Ft. Meade Fire Department was looking for a training officer. The team to select the new employee walked into a pet shop and was looking at the animals on display. While they were there, another fire chief walked in and said to the shopkeeper, "I'll take a fire monkey, please." The shopkeeper nodded, went over to a cage at the side of the shop and took out a monkey. He fit it with a collar and leash, handed it to the fire chief saying, "That'll be $1000." The fire chief paid and walked out with his monkey.

Startled, the selection went over to the shopkeeper and said, "That was a very expensive monkey. Most of them are only a few hundred dollars. Why did it cost so much?" The shopkeeper answered, "Ah, that monkey can fight fires expertly with the Booster line, with the inch and a half line, and the two and a half line, and is certified on all pumping apparatus and the aerial ladder trucks. ---- well worth the money!!

The selection team looked at the monkey in another cage. "That one's even more expensive!

"$10,000! What does it do?" "Oh, that one's a certified instructor monkey; it can instruct other monkeys in basic fire fighting skills, fire prevention training, physical training, haz-mat unit tactics and fire investigative techniques, and even use wordperfect! ... All the really useful stuff," said the shopkeeper.

The selection team looked around for a little longer and saw a third monkey in a large cage of it's own. The price tag around it's neck read $70,000.
they gasped to the shopkeeper, "That one costs more than all the others put together! What on earth does it do?" The shopkeeper replied, "Well, I haven't actually seen it do anything, ..... But it says it's a past "Fire Chief".

[firechief46]

PICTURES FROM THE PAST

Here is an oldie but a goodie.

Pictured from left to right: Yours truly, The Master Trainer and his pet monkey and James B. Nichols.

Charlie: Hey Jimmy, look, what's going on over there?

Jimbo: Oh, them? Well Wilburs been a very bad ape as of late, and the best part is he's trying to explain that comment he made earlier, something about a stupid "porch monkey".

[firechief46]

Ever wonder what it looked like when big monkey protects little monkey? Well here it is.

[capt46]

Isn't that the call where old Chief Shelton called for the 2nd alarm on a garage fire from #1 station? I believe the FTI lost about 1000' of 3" going to the same call.

RJU

[Public Defender]

That's the one,

Actually it was just a shed fire. Funny thing is that if Chief Shelton stayed much longer ole WIlbur would be canned.







"Defender of Idiots"

[firechief46]

(laughing my ass off) Thats a good one defender. The truth is your right.

[firechief46]

MESSAGE FROM WILBUR: To all you as_wipes in Annapolis. Do you really think you are so smart to have played me? For I am the smartest monkey that walks this weak and pitiful planet called earth. Do you really think that you belly crawling scavengers who cannot walk upright could make my type extinct? You are nothing but encrustations that form upon my nutsack. Ape scientist Jane Goodall worships the ground that I walk upon. For I am KING of the silverbacks and you are but peelings from my bananas strewn upon the soil. Bow before me, for I am now and ever will be KING of this and any other jungle which I deem worthy of sprinkling my filth and seed. I am not a “damn dirty ape” but rather the elite upon my species.

I have come here to this forum to announce the forming of my empire. All monkeys and apes shall unite under one banner to destroy all mankind. Fear not terrorist but rather fear the "CHUMP"! (Criminal Headquarters for Underworld Master Plan), ...


Best Regards,

WILBUR

[firechief46]

correctomundo!

[firechief46]

Great News: Milton Bradley named a game after our boy.

[firechief46]

The MRS. and I wish everyone a Happy Thanksgiving and a safe holiday season.