Quick Question

[Chia6004]

I was just wondering what everyone's opinion about dating another member of the Fire Service are EMS is. It seems that every one I talk to doesn't have an issue with it, but I do. Just wondering if I'm the only one out there like this????

[Dex133]

I personally think it's not a good idea to date someone from the same station or workplace, just remember to keep the difference of opinions on public safety outta the relationship.

[thefrmn78]

As one of our members said recently, it is okay if you date members of the fire/ems service, just not the ones from your own station. I am in agreement with this statement due to the fact that if you meet someone from a different county, who cares if they are in the fire service or not. If you have something in common and get along great, then go with it. I don't think you should date someone in the same dept. though.

[LostOnScene]

if you keep your personal life from gettin in the way of your job preformance...i see no problem w/ it.

[Dex133]

if you keep your personal life from gettin in the way of your job preformance...i see no problem w/ it.

And you know as well I was I do, PEOPLE TALK. When People talk, they talk bullshit, make rumors and lies. Is it really worth the hassle at work? or even at a vollunteer house?

[LostOnScene]

And you know as well I was I do, PEOPLE TALK. When People talk, they talk bullshit, make rumors and lies. Is it really worth the hassle at work? or even at a vollunteer house?

oh like the so called "sex scandal"?

[Dex133]

oh like the so called "sex scandal"?
EXACTLY MY POINT!....wanna argue some more about this?

[LostOnScene]

EXACTLY MY POINT!....wanna argue some more about this?

BRING IT ON!!! Wanna take it outside?! :eek:

[Dex133]

You better pack a lunch and bring a jumpkit! I'm gonna be hungry when I'm done with you, and you're gonna need some bandaging up!

[LostOnScene]

You better pack a lunch and bring a jumpkit! I'm gonna be hungry when I'm done with you, and you're gonna need some bandaging up!

pack yourself some chili i know you have some mighty tasty stuff in the fridge...don't forget my iced tea... bring it tuff guy!

[Dex133]

How about I just eat the chili and take you out with the ass of death?

[LostOnScene]

How about I just eat the chili and take you out with the ass of death?

umm...excuse me...check please? :confused:

maybe i'll use the pennies to buy an air freshener for your ass of death

[Dex133]

:D Chia...sorry for getting off the subject :D

[Chia6004]

No worries.

[Dex133]

Seriously though Chia, Lost and I know each other quite well...well enough that she knows what's in my fridge. So we playfully argue. I've seen it enough that as soon as you start showing interest in someone from your station, the rumors start flying. If either of you are in a position of power, than it becomes 10 times worse. You can try to keep it quiet from the other members or co-workers, but is that how you really wanna have a relationship with someone, always on the sly and hiding things from the people you spend 40+ hours a week with. It's just something I've always been against.

[SmokeyAxe]

This topic kinda hit's home with me 'cause I just broke up with a girl from my station...
So my opinion is it's okay to date someone from your station....but you can NEVER EVER break up...easy enough right?

[Dex133]

This topic kinda hit's home with me 'cause I just broke up with a girl from my station...
So my opinion is it's okay to date someone from your station....but you can NEVER EVER break up...easy enough right?

Only in a perfect world my friend, only in a perfect world. :rolleyes:

[BigGreasy]

Well i had a friend that did it twice and the relationships failed. Thats when it got nasty,and of coruse added to station arguments and all. Imagine stress of work now combine it with stress of bad break up and all that goes on enough said. Luckily transfers at members request happened. Ahh peace again. lol

[hog]

i think the best saying for this is don`t shit where you eat.......because after the breakup it will be nothing but problems....in my OPINION

[No Fear]

Chia, I have no problems with it, depends how you air your laundry... I had a thing for a paramedic , and I have been married to her for 20 years. Like I said depends on how you air your laundry at the station.

I'm going with the New York Guys ..... Go BUSH!

[No Fear]

Hog, Glad to see your still making brainless, oops intelligent remarks.

[hog]

you must really like me No Fear.......i am so sorry that you don`t like my opinions ...but oh fucking well ...get over it and quit crying PLEASE

[burning85]

Once more Hog was on a roll with non-shit starting replies,and No Fear you come at him with a shot! How can you preach to the guy constantly about being "brainless" and telling him to shut up and get over things? sounds like this time around you should take your own advice?!
Oh and back to the topic...same station romance, not the best idea. Even with out a break up there is always someone who likes to run their mouth and fire up the rumor mill.

[Chia6004]

Thanks for the replies everyone my mind is now made up I will let this mutual attraction die off.

[Emtmom]

Mutual respect and maturity go a long way. I dated someone I was on the ambulance with, for over a year. When we split we still worked together and to this day he is one of my best friends. No one talked, of course this would be where the maturity would come in to play. I was a board member, there were no rumors.
If there are rumors or there is talk, deal with it. For all you know a mutual attraction could be alot more, are you willing to toss that because some immature people like to talk?
FYI.....I met my husband when he joined the department. We've been together for 12 years.

[No Fear]

thanks no fire your opinion is welcomed, and your right.end of story

[Fghtng5thFemale]

Seriously though Chia, Lost and I know each other quite well...well enough that she knows what's in my fridge. So we playfully argue. I've seen it enough that as soon as you start showing interest in someone from your station, the rumors start flying. If either of you are in a position of power, than it becomes 10 times worse. You can try to keep it quiet from the other members or co-workers, but is that how you really wanna have a relationship with someone, always on the sly and hiding things from the people you spend 40+ hours a week with. It's just something I've always been against.

I would like to believe it's possible, maybe it's just the optimist in me. After all, you met over a common interest and who else could better understand the lifestyle. But Dex is right, the rumor mill is horrible and it's unavoidable. No matter what you do, how quiet you are about it, or how professional you keep it at the station, there will always be gossip and it's more hurtful then most people ever realize.
To believe that it will last "forever" and that you'll never break up is only true in fairy tales. Not only do you risk losing a great friend if it doesn't work, but it could very possibly cost you your membership at your station if there are problems. Relationships in the same station just isn't ideal.

[Chia6004]

I just wanted to say thanks once more to everyone who responded to this thread you helped me come to a desicion.

[Fghtng5thFemale]

I just wanted to say thanks once more to everyone who responded to this thread you helped me come to a desicion.

I understand where you are coming from Chia6004. When you are around the same group people all the time and you really get to know them, it's unrealistic to think you will never develop feelings/interest for someone in the group. It's really a matter of whether or not the risk factors are worth it. Do you care enough about this person to face the all the possible outcomes and crap you may have to put up with? Or is it just a passing attraction?
It's a very tough call and the sad part is that either way you go you will have some disappointments and downsides. It's the fork in the road deal. One path leads you down the same old road, but you know what to expect and nothing changes. The other path is uncertain and exciting, but you have no idea where it will lead you or what it might change. No one else on here can tell you what decision to make. You have to do that on your own because it's your life and you have to live with your choices.

[AnytimeAnywhere]

Alot of you have argued some very good points. But being someone who was in a FD relations ship, I can say that yes it can work. There are a few key things that need to be understood by both parties:
You both have to understand how the firehouse rumor mill works, and realize that shit will be said by people for any number of reasons, but as long as you too understand that then there shouldn't be any problems.
The second and probably most important is keep the "personal relationship" put of the station. NO PDA or anything like that. When you are at the station, it's strictly business. Even if one of you is an officer, you both have to understand that business is business. If your significant other gets reprimanded for something you need to stay out of it, it's business. Hell as an Officer I had to reprimand my girlfriend at the time... granted she was pissed, but when we left the station everything was cool. She understood why I did what I did and that is was strictly business, but it didn't spawn any problems in our personal life.
It's more work than an relationship outside of the department, But it can be done, and it may be worth it for you. The whole "it will last forever fairy tale/ loose a good friend" thing is true no matter what relationship you are in.
But as long as you can distinguish and keep separate your personal and business lives. There should be no problems.

[burning85]

good points ANYTIME.

[Quacker]

If I was going to date someone, and if that person was another firefighter, and that member wanted to date me, I would and it would be some one of the other gender. Male + Female.

;) ;) ;)